• Angela D. Henderson

3 Common Mistakes to Avoid When Going Through a Divorce

It can be devastating when a relationship comes to an end, more so when you were close enough to have decided to commit to each other in marriage. Couples separate for different reasons. No matter what the reason for your separation is, it is important to ensure your legal rights are protected. The following are some common mistakes that you should avoid when going through a divorce to ensure a better outcome for you.


1. Referring to friends or family for legal advice

Going through a divorce isn’t easy. You may want to seek support from those around you in order to cope with the difficult situation. However, be careful about the type of support you ask of your friends and family. While you can and should seek emotional support from your friends and family, you should never rely on them for legal advice.


Unless your friend is an experienced divorce attorney in Illinois, you should never take their legal advice as law. People around you mean well and will do their best to support you. However, they do not have the qualifications, knowledge or experience to give you legal advice. Always refer to your divorce lawyer for legal advice.


2. Using your kids to get your way

You may be feeling hurt and angry. You may be desperate to find a way to hurt your ex just as they hurt you. Some couples use their children as bargaining chips. They threaten their spouses in order to get what they want. Some even turn their children against their ex-spouse.

While you may get a temporary feeling of triumph when you get your way, your children will suffer the consequences of your actions for a long time after the divorce proceedings. The emotional impact of witnessing their parents fight during a divorce will be long-lasting on your children. Many children end up with lower grades, becoming depressed, dropping out of school, getting into drugs or even attempting suicide.


Badmouthing your ex-spouse to your children could also hurt your chances of getting custody. The court may decide that the children are better off in the care of your spouse for their wellbeing.


3. Not writing everything down

It’s easy for things to get complicated in a divorce, especially when it comes to deciding on sensitive matters such as child custody and division of assets. Even couples that are able to discuss these issues amicably can disagree on issues later in the process.


It is important to have everything written down, especially when you come to an agreement. It isn’t enough to shake hands on it. You need to have a record to show what you both agreed on. You can refer back to this record in case of future disagreements. The agreements should be witnessed by your lawyers.


If you’re going through a divorce, be sure to keep the mistakes above in mind and avoid them. You should also hire an experienced divorce attorney to guide you through the process and ensure your rights are protected.


HENDERSON & MEHTA LAW

 and Mediation Center

© HENDERSON & MEHTA LAW and MEDIATION CENTER 

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. DISCLAIMER | PRIVACY POLICY